If I don’t Reach Out

I lay in my bed… the same as last night

Phone in my hand, no messages in sight

Not even a “hey,” not even a lie

Just silence that feels like a slow goodbye

I scroll through names I’d die for cold

But none of them check if I’m growing old

They laugh, they post, they live their days

While I disappear in quiet ways

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I always text first. I always care.

But when I go quiet, no one's there.

I’m the background friend. The afterthought.

The one they reach for… when they forgot.

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If I don’t reach out… would they even know?

Would my absence echo, or just let go?

If I stopped breathing in this darkened room,

Would anyone feel that kind of doom?

I don’t want fame. I don’t want light.

I just want someone to ask if I’m alright.

But every time I stop, the silence stays…

And no one even looks my way.

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I’ve smiled at people while falling apart

Held in the screams deep in my heart

I’ve sent love that no one sends back

And kept breaking under all I lack

I’ve celebrated them from far outside

But no one’s stood here on my side

They post “check on your friends” and go

Right past the signs I never show

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I’ve typed “I’m not okay” then hit delete

Because being real feels like defeat

No one stays when I need most

I’m just a heartbeat next to a ghost

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If I don’t reach out… would they feel the hole?

Or would my memory never unfold?

If I go silent, would they call my name?

Or just move on, all the same?

I’m not asking for the world, just a soul

To love me when I lose control

But when I fade, when I don’t try…

No one sees.

No one cries.

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So I lay in my room, phone to my chest

Wondering if anyone cares I exist

And in the silence, the truth comes clear…

They were never really here.