Lost and confused, I'am sure this wasn't the dream I had dreamt of in
my youth. The happily ever after that existed in my mind didn't look like
the ever after I'm existing in today. This isn't at all what I had imagined,
this can not be my dream. It's all wrong, misplaced or a dream of
another's as I know this one is not mine! I would have never dreamed of
such an empty and cold place.
I shake myself in an attempt to wake and flee from this hell that
surrounds me. But, I don't wake. Is this me? Is this my dream after all?
Was there no mistake? Why can't I wake?
Everything that is right in front of me seem miles away? My soul
attempts to pull me from the grips of this hollow hole but my mind is
much stronger and my soul fails.
Everything here feels as cold as ice. Nothing here has warmth not even
the air I breath. What has happened? What transpired to leave me in
such a place?
I so want to feel and to love again. I want to feel alive again within
myself. But most of all, I want to know that I mattered, that I lived, and
that I loved and that I was loved.
He took my heart with only one slight move of his hand and with
another quick move it was replaced with this hollowness. I can recall the
day of this change but not the act of it's happening. The last thing I
remember was looking deep into his eyes. It was at that moment when I
fell so deep into his grip. The grip has been bound to me since that day.
Once my eyes were freed from the depth of his hold, I remember
looking for what I had last recalled to be his face. It wasn't as I had just
remembered it in just a few moments before. It was no longer the face
of the one I had trusted. This face was similar; so I would not be
alarmed. But yet I noticed. Not fearful, I chose to ignore the signs of
caution and quickly adjusted as if nothing had transpired.
I gazed deeply into his face and then into his eyes. Still adjusting to my
new vision I trusted that my eyes were not deceiving me yet I was leery.
I relished in learning these was of his darkness and teachings of SELF.
My lesson was complete and a new journey had begun.
I began the hunt in search of a face. No need for a heart for this I had
plans to replace. Cold and calculated was now the altered me as I set out on my path of destruction. If the face I seek is attached to a heart I will quickly teach my newly acquired skill of leaving it behind.
You dare to ask me about mine? I'll lie to your face as I look in your eyes until passionately you fall deeper into my grip and join me in this hollow place. It wont take long before you to will come to understand. Don't waste my time with sharing your dreams, I don't care. I'm in this for me only; it has nothing to do with you. I'm on a mission of
destruction and have no time for you to be in my way. Now come alongand pretend with me as I teach you a thing or two.
Were you not listening? You should have learned this by now? Your
weakness is pathetic and has no influence over me. I will easily chew youup
