You still text me “you good” when the
World gets too loud
Like you know when I’m folding in
You always knew before I did
My boyfriend makes me laugh till I can’t
Breath right
But when I cry he jokes through it
And you would ask me why
Long curls falling in your hand eyes
That same smile I memorized
Somehow every flaw looked good on you
Maybe that’s what love can do
My friends all ask about you
I shrug and say “we’re cool”
Like I don’t replay your voice
When my room gets quiet
I still save you the last sip of water
Still buy your favorite gum at the store
Still dream about the way you held me
Like nobody’s touched me before
And I love him
God, I really do
Your girl might hate the way we talk
So I keep my distance now
Read our messages twice before sending them out
But you still thank me softly when I hand
You cash
Like I’m somebody precious
Like I still mattered
You were Emmy first everything
First ache, first attachment
First boy that made my chest feel panic
A month apart, too young to know
How somebody can leave
But still feel like home
And he’s sweet in all the right ways
Funny every bad day
But you listen like the moon listens to the tide
You always take my feelings serious
That’s what keeps me curious
That’s what keeps you living in my mind
I still save you the last sip of water
Still buy you your favorite gum at the store
Still miss the way your arms would find me
Like I was worth protecting for
And I love him
I swear it’s true
But some nights I still wake up
Looking for you
You still feel familiar
Like a star I know too well
And I don’t reach for you anymore
But I still feel it when you do