[verse]
Lord,—it’s been some time (now),
I been so disconnected from all of Your excellence.
Left a couple messages before my decline—
What’s been happening?
My life full of madness. It’s tragic…
With patience, I been practicing,
Plotting my escape from this hell before my demons come back again.
Oh well.
I got a new job, I’ve been traveling—hotels to hoetales.
I know I’ve been sinning a lot…
Please forgive me, I ain’t know well.
It’s been six months…
You know that I regret my decision.
But I’m confused—
Was I wrong? Was I right?
Ion think I can choose.
But that’s some old news,
I’m still dealin’ with some IOUs.
It’s a difference—
Knowin’ my freedom feel so contingent
On the things I can prove…
And what happened—
Don’t make me feel like less of a fool.
[Melodic Hums – low, mournful female harmonies]
(Mm-mm… mm-hmm…) [echoing like distant voices]
[Emotional Breakdown Interlude – Female Voice]
[crying, yelling, layered chaos—overlapping and spiraling]
[yelling]
“I hate you!”
“I wish he killed you!”
“You always ruin everything—EVERYTHING!”
“Why do you make me feel like I’m nothing?!”
[crying, voice breaking]
“Why are you leaving me?”
“Please… don’t walk away from me…”
“I knew you’d leave me—just like everybody else…”
[desperate, unhinged]
“Answer the damn phone!”
“You don’t love me!”
“Ten times—I called you TEN TIMES!”
“You don’t even care!”
[sobbing, whispery]
“I’m so lonely…”
“I don’t know what happened… he just left…”
[cold, blank]
“You never call. You never text. You’re never there when I need you.”
[screamed]
“LEAVE!! NOW!!”
⸻
[Melodic Hums – rising slightly, pulsing]
(Mm-mm… where do I go from here?)
⸻
[verse]
…Every day.
The words that live free in my mind.
Is this the perfect time to be runnin’ away?
I did everything I could… got nothin’ left I can say.
And even worse—
They paint me as the villain without knowin’ my pain.
I fcked up… but you fcked up too.
And even through the lies,
I know I still gotta stay true.
⸻
[Melodic Hums – now lower, fading like breath]
(Mmm… still don’t know…)
⸻
[Switch-up]
Am I still worth saving?
Or did I just drift too far?
Am I still worth saving?
Or is this just who we are?
Am I still worth saving?
Why does love feel like war?
Am I still worth saving?
Why does silence hurt more?
Am I still worth saving?
If I don’t even know what I need?
Am I still worth saving?
If peace don’t come when I bleed?
Am I still worth saving?
Or am I talking to myself?
Am I still worth saving?
Do You even check for my health?
Am I still worth saving?
Or is this just how it ends?
Am I still worth saving?
If I don’t know where I begin?
Am I still worth saving?
Am I still worth saving?
Am I still worth saving?
…Or was I ever?
⸻
[Final Whisper]
“…I just don’t know anymore.”
BlackREVIVEDDC
