[Verse 1]
I keep a ledger in the kitchen drawer
Receipts for every promise I ignored
Your name is folded underneath the bills
I read it when the house goes still
I learned to leave before the questions came
Turn every kindness into something to blame
You held the door, I watched it close
Then told myself that no one knows
[Pre-Chorus]
But the mirror keeps the balance
And it never rounds the sum
Every small retreat is counted
Every place I should have come
[Chorus]
I am unsettled, laid open and plain
All of my failures have learned my name
I built a shelter out of borrowed skin
Now every wall lets the weather in
If I confess, will the damage remain?
If I go quiet, am I hiding again?
I am unsettled, with nowhere to stand
My hands full of reasons, my heart full of sand
[Verse 2]
I missed the call on the night you broke
Kept my own silence and called it hope
The blue light faded across the floor
I knew what it meant, still I waited more
I made a habit of being almost there
A chair pulled back from the family square
I praised my fear for keeping me safe
Then wondered why love had nowhere to stay
[Pre-Chorus]
Now the old excuses falter
Like loose paint beneath the rain
Every door I left unopened
Has a voice behind the frame
[Chorus]
I am unsettled, laid open and plain
All of my failures have learned my name
I built a shelter out of borrowed skin
Now every wall lets the weather in
If I confess, will the damage remain?
If I go quiet, am I hiding again?
I am unsettled, with nowhere to stand
My hands full of reasons, my heart full of sand
[Bridge]
Do not make me noble
Do not make me clean
I was there for every fracture
I was somewhere in between
I want to say I’m sorry
Without asking to be freed
I want to face the person
Who was waiting there for me
[Instrumental]
[Final Chorus]
I am unsettled, but finally still
No more disguising the shape of my will
The house is broken, the account is true
There is no stranger left to blame but you
If I confess, let the silence remain
If I go quiet, let it teach me my name
I am unsettled, but here I can stand
With nothing but truth in my unsteady hands
[Outro]
The drawer is empty
The door is wide
I leave the light on
And step inside