Babysitter doll

Verse 1

I wake up to a nursery clock

Tick-tick, bottle’s warm, my youth’s on lock

Hands too small but I’m playing mom

While my own name fades from the intercom

They say, “Be grateful, this is love”

But love shouldn’t feel like a cage with gloves

I fold my dreams with the laundry piles

Smiling big just to hide denial

Pre-Chorus

They dress me up in responsibility

Call it “family” but it’s killing me

I’m a kid raising kids in a house that breathes

But never lets me leave

Chorus

I’m a babysitter doll in a dollhouse lie

Painted smile, but the seams won’t hide

Friends outside with their halos bent

I rot inside where the rules are cement

I’m not bad, I’m just not free

Call me weird for wanting to be me

Wind-up heart, but it’s breaking slow

I’m not your mother—I’m your ghost

Verse 2

They go out laughing, tagging walls

I memorize bedtime protocol

I watch my youth through a windowpane

Like a TV show I can’t replay

They say, “You’re mature for your age”

That’s just trauma in a prettier phrase

I trade my weekends for lullabies

While envy drips from my tired eyes

Pre-Chorus

I bite my tongue till it tastes like rust

They say “family first,” so I bury my trust

If I scream, I’m ungrateful, spoiled, obscene

So I cry real quiet in between

Chorus

I’m a babysitter doll in a dollhouse lie

Porcelain lungs, but I still can’t cry

Invites unread, phone on my chest

I’m punished for needing rest

I’m not strange, I’m just alone

Blooming in a room I’ve outgrown

Wind-up heart, about to blow

I’m not your mother—I’m your ghost

Bridge (Portals energy)

If I grow wings, will you clip them clean?

Say freedom’s selfish, call it a sin

I’m stitched with guilt, tied with thread

They built my crown out of things unsaid

I don’t hate the kids, I hate the role

Hate being swallowed to make you whole

I’m not evil, cold, or unkind

I just want my life to feel like mine

Break (soft, eerie)

If I disappear, would you even know?

Or would the house just overflow?

Final Chorus

I’m a babysitter doll, cracked and bent

Still apologizing for my resentment

If loving you means losing me

Then love’s just another captivity

I’m not broken, I’m overdue

For a door that opens, a sky that’s blue

Wind-up heart, let it finally go

I’m not your mother—I’m my own

Outro

When I leave this house, I’ll learn to breathe

Learn that wanting more isn’t a disease

I’ll bury the doll, keep the girl alive

And for the first time—I’ll choose my life