[Intro – Billy]
I don’t get redemption arcs.
I get moments.
And mine ran out…
So listen.
[Verse 1]
California sun burned holes in my skin,
Dad’s fist louder than the words he was in.
Learned real quick how to stay on attack,
If you show weakness, they put a boot in your back.
Every mirror looked like someone I hate,
Every warning sign said I was too late.
I didn’t wake up evil, I woke up afraid,
So I learned how to hurt before I got played.
Anger was armor, fists were my speech,
Cruel was the distance I kept within reach.
I lashed out first so I wouldn’t break,
Turned pain into power, rage into shape.
[Hook]
I was never clean, never right, never safe,
Carried my hell every step that I take.
I know what I did, I know what I caused,
I won’t ask forgiveness — just pause.
If this is the end, let it be true,
I’m sorry… for what I put you through.
[Verse 2]
Then something crawled inside my head,
Used every scar, every word he said.
Showed me oceans, showed me fire,
Turned my hunger into a choir.
I wasn’t steering — I was chained,
Watching my body commit the pain.
Every scream felt like déjà vu,
Like the monster already knew me too.
I saw her face when I hurt Max,
Saw myself crack but I still snapped back.
She deserved better, I knew it then,
But knowing don’t stop the spiral you in.
[Hook]
I was never clean, never right, never safe,
Carried my hell every step that I take.
I know what I did, I know what I caused,
I won’t ask forgiveness — just pause.
If this is the end, let it be true,
I’m sorry… for what I put you through.
[Verse 3]
When the smoke cleared, I remembered her,
My mom in the sand, her voice a blur.
She told me once I wasn’t my pain,
But I built my name out of chains.
Saw the kids stand where I always ran,
Saw a girl still reach for my hand.
That’s when I knew — it ends right here,
Not as a monster, not ruled by fear.
I stood in front of it, felt my bones crack,
Didn’t win the war — just pushed it back.
One choice clean in a life gone wrong,
One moment strong after being weak so long.
[Bridge]
I won’t pretend I’m healed or good,
I won’t erase what I never could.
But if one act can break the line,
Let it be mine.
[Final Hook]
I was never clean, never right, never safe,
But I chose the end I’d rather face.
Tell Max I tried, tell her I see,
Tell her the monster wasn’t me.
If these are the words I leave behind,
Let them mean something this time.
[Outro – Billy]
I’m sorry.
Not for dying.
For living wrong…
for too long.
InfiniteBars_ai
