[Intro]
Dark outside but my thoughts still loud
Silence in the crib, feel it pressin’ down
One lonely night, I’m facin’ myself
All this money and fame, still losin’ my health
[Verse 1]
I done touched a mil’, still feel like I’m broke
Not in my pockets, more like my soul
Fame got me boxed, I’m playin’ a role
Smilin’ in public, inside I’m cold
I push love away like it’s poison to sip
Every time I trust, it just end in some shit
Women come close, then they dip when it’s real
Guess they love the image but not how I feel
Niggas turn strangers when money involved
Loyalty rare, that shit hard to find
Late nights starin’, just questionin’ God
Like why all this pain come packaged with shine?
Voices in my head say I’m losin’ control
Tellin’ me success came with a hole
Fill it with smoke, liquor, and hoes
But shit don’t work, it just bury me more
[Pre-Chorus]
Who really here when the lights go dim?
Who gon’ stay when it’s all cave in?
Look in the mirror, I question that man
Is he really him or just playin’ pretend?
[Chorus]
One lonely night, trapped in my mind
Searchin’ for peace I can’t fuckin’ find
Lovin’ and hurtin’ at the same damn time
Fightin’ my demons, just tryna survive
One lonely night, yeah I sit on this throne
Whole world watchin’, still feel alone
Said I’d be strong, never fold under pressure
But this shit heavy, I’m losin’ my center
[Verse 2]
I been battlin’ demons I don’t let show
Carry that weight everywhere that I go
They see the chains but don’t see the scars
Don’t know the nights I was prayin’ in the dark
I let that trauma just sit in my chest
Turned into anger, then turned into stress
I tried to heal but I numbed it instead
Now it come back every time that I rest
Pour me a drink just to quiet the noise
Roll me a doobie, I’m chasin’ some peace
Temporary highs but the pain still deep
Shit come right back when the high decrease
I gave my heart to people that lied
Kept it too real, got cut by the ties
Now I move cautious, I question intentions
Every “I love you” sound like a disguise
And maybe it’s me, maybe I built these walls
Afraid if I open, I might just fall
So I play strong, never show when I’m weak
But that shit heavy, it’s killin’ me slow
Success feel hollow when you got no one
Celebratin’ wins but can’t call no one
Phone full of numbers I never can trust
What’s the point of it all if it’s only me, huh?
⸻
[Pre-Chorus]
Who really ridin’? Who solid for me?
Past all the clout and the money I see
Look in my eyes, it’s deeper than rap
I’m fightin’ myself just to stay on track
[Chorus]
One lonely night, trapped in my mind
Searchin’ for peace I can’t fuckin’ find
Lovin’ and hurtin’ at the same damn time
Fightin’ my demons, just tryna survive
One lonely night, yeah I sit on this throne
Whole world watchin’, still feel alone
Said I’d be strong, never fold under pressure
But this shit heavy, I’m losin’ my center
[Outro]
Shadows creep, I can’t outrun the pain
Every night feel the same damn strain
Screamin’ inside but it don’t translate
MalikKingston
