Shards Of Me

static hum…

heartbeat off…

can’t feel… can’t think…

I wake up in pieces, scattered on the floor,

world spinning too fast, every knock on the door

echoes like blame, like I’m already broken,

every word a cut, every glance a token.

I move through the day, hollow behind my eyes,

smiling like I’m fine while everything dies.

Hands shake, chest tight, screaming inside,

I’m here, but my soul’s running, trying to hide.

And I hate it, hate it, hate it —

the world keeps going while I stall.

I fight, I bleed, I’m invisible,

trapped inside these walls.

I’m angry and quiet, I’m lost and loud,

I’m here in the crowd but I’m not allowed.

Everything hurts and nothing makes sense,

life keeps hitting — I can’t pay the rent.

I’m shards of me scattered, alone in the storm,

trying to survive in a body I can’t transform.

They think I’m strong, they think I can take it,

they don’t see the nights I can’t fake it.

Every ex, every lie, every “it’s fine,”

stacking up inside me, a jagged line.

I’m screaming in silence, yelling in the dark,

trying to find my place, trying to leave a mark.

But luck’s never mine, just hits over and over,

I’m drowning in memories I can’t sober.

And I hate it, hate it, hate it —

the world keeps spinning like I don’t exist.

I claw, I fight, I’m fading again,

lost in the fog, lost in the mist.

I’m angry and quiet, I’m lost and loud,

I’m here in the crowd but I’m not allowed.

Everything hurts and nothing makes sense,

life keeps hitting — I can’t pay the rent.

I’m shards of me scattered, alone in the storm,

trying to survive in a body I can’t transform.

I dissociate, watch myself go,

numb in the echo of every blow.

Anger burns, and sorrow claws,

I want to vanish but I’m bound by laws —

laws of survival, laws of pain,

laws of my heart bleeding in vain.

grrr…

shards…

static…

can’t…

can’t…

breathe…

I’m angry and quiet, I’m lost and loud,

I’m here in the crowd but I’m not allowed.

Everything hurts and nothing makes sense,

life keeps hitting — I can’t pay the rent.

I’m shards of me scattered, alone in the storm,

trying to survive in a body I can’t transform.

heartbeat muted…

eyes closed…

just fragments…

just me…