Verse 1
I don’t pray like I’m forgiven,
I don’t kneel like I’m clean.
I’ve been carrying my silence
longer than it’s carried me.
Every promise that I ever made
left splinters in my hands,
I didn’t break the good on purpose—
I just did the best I can.
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Pre-Chorus
I’ve seen mercy in the waiting room,
I’ve seen fear dressed up as peace.
Faith ain’t built on what you’re told—
it’s who you are when no one speaks.
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Chorus
If heaven’s real, it knows my weight,
It won’t ask where I’ve been.
No gold crown, no judgment face,
just a place to finally sit.
I don’t need wings or sympathy,
I’ve stood long enough to see—
If heaven’s real, it holds a chair,
not a throne,
for me.
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Verse 2
I learned strength can be a habit
you don’t notice till it breaks.
I smiled through the kind of tired
that no amount of sleep can shake.
I watched good men fade to shadows
trying hard to stay ahead,
I stayed long enough to save the house
but not enough to save myself.
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Lift
I don’t blame the road for the distance
or the fire for the flame—
But I still hoped someone noticed
what it cost me to remain.
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Chorus
If heaven’s real, it knows my weight,
every night I stayed awake.
Every loss I couldn’t name,
every choice I couldn’t take.
I don’t need saving, don’t need proof,
I’ve already paid my dues—
If heaven’s real, it holds a chair
and lets me breathe the truth.
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Bridge
Maybe grace don’t shout or sparkle,
maybe God don’t raise His voice.
Maybe peace is just a moment
when you’re finally out of choices.
If forgiveness has a language,
it don’t sound like shame—
It sounds like rest after the long way
when nobody knows your name.
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Final Chorus
If heaven’s real, it knows my weight,
the shape of every scar.
It won’t ask me for my reasons
or who I think you are.
I won’t stand or bow or plead,
I’ve done my time, I’m free—
If heaven’s real, it holds a chair
and leaves it there
for me.
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Outro
I don’t need to be remembered right,
I just need to finally sleep.
If heaven’s real…
it knows I kept my feet.
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