i’ll make it (even if it breaks me)

It’s 3AM, my hands are shaking

Books are open, my hope is breaking

All these voices in my head

Saying, “you’re not enough again”

I text you once, you don’t reply

I tell myself, “don’t start to cry”

But everything feels far away

Like even air forgot to stay

And they say “it’s just a phase”

But it feels like my heart decays

I miss your laugh, I miss your face

But time just slips, and I can’t chase

I’ll make it, even if it breaks me

Even when my chest feels empty

Even when I scream into a pillow

Even when it rains inside my shadow

You don’t know how hard it’s been

But I won’t let this be the end

I’ll pass this test, I’ll mend my soul

I’ll make it back to you — I know

My room is cold, the lights are low

And every page feels like a blow

To my mind, to my breath

I’m scared to death of this stress

But you — you were my calm in storm

And now it’s gone, and I’m alone

I whisper jokes into the air

Pretend you’re still sitting there

I see you in my tea cup

In scribbled words I mess up

In every song I try to sing

You were my autumn, my everything

But I’ll survive

Even if I don’t know why

Even if I cry again tonight

I’ll still be standing by daylight

I’ll make it, even if it breaks me

Even if the world forsakes me

Even with this pain inside

I’ll come out clean on the other side

So wait for me, please don’t let go

I’ll meet you where the lilacs grow

This isn’t goodbye — it’s just a storm

I’ll find my way back to your warmth

i’ll make it

…even if it breaks me