Parked Outside Your Gate

(Rain pattering… wipers squeak… engine humming softly)

“I’m parked outside your gate… but it feels too damn late…”

“Hozier’s playing, but I can’t feel the song…”

I came to fix what we let break,

But this ache is more than I can fake.

You were my world, I wore the mask,

Perfect on paper — afraid to ask.

Now the silence fills the car,

Ghosts of us in every scar.

I close my eyes, but I still see —

A version of who I thought I’d be.

I’ve been two halves stitched with shame,

Living under someone else’s name.

And now that truth begins to chase…

I can’t outrun this place.

I’m parked outside your gate,

With my heart in retrograde.

Torn between the past I claimed,

And someone else who knows my name.

Tears fall like the pouring rain,

One for love, and two for pain.

I wish I knew who I should be…

But I’m parked outside… your memory.

There’s someone who sees the mess I hide,

No judgment — just the storm inside.

She never asked me to explain,

Just held the flame inside my name.

But your voice is in this car,

Faint like smoke but never far.

I thought I’d made a choice tonight —

But both feel like they’re right.

She’s fire, she’s truth, she’s wild and free,

You were quiet skies and history.

And I’m somewhere in between…

Breaking under what I mean.

I’m parked outside your gate,

But it’s me I can’t locate.

I loved you once — I still might —

But someone else holds my light.

I’ve been burning in two names,

Playing roles in different games.

I don’t know how to choose…

Either way, I lose.

Why does it hurt this much

To love, to break, to touch?

Why can’t I just be enough

Without pretending I’m tough?

One pulled me into peace,

The other set me free.

But maybe this isn’t about them —

Maybe it’s about me.

I’m parked outside your gate,

But I can’t hold this weight.

I loved you once — I still might —

But I need to find my own light.

I’m not the man I used to be,

I’m letting someone in — finally.

So with shaking hands, I say…

I have to drive away.

(Wipers squeak. Piano fades. Rain softens. Silence. Then the sound of tires over wet pavement… and gone.)