Mother's Day

Mother’s Day came and went this year

I stood with my kids while they gathered near

Watched ‘em laugh and hand their mama cards

Tried to hold that moment in my heart

I bought her flowers, signed my name

Thanked her for the love she gives away

And somewhere in the middle of the day

Your boy forgot your holiday

Now I’m staring at the ceiling in the dark

Wondering what kind of son forgets a heart like yours

What’s wrong with me, Mom?

Why didn’t I break down?

You spent your whole life

Keeping us safe somehow

You carried our worries

Like they were yours alone

And the first Mother’s Day

Since Heaven called you home

I still hear your voice

Every time life goes wrong

Still see your picture smiling

From my living room wall

I love you, Mom

God knows I do

So what’s wrong with me

That I didn’t think of you?

A few weeks back me and my brother and sister

Stood beside your name together

I touched those letters carved in stone

And cried like I was still your little boy coming home

And I remembered all the nights

I fought you hard, said you weren’t right

Now I’m older, raising kids myself

Finding pieces of you in everybody else

And I still got that voicemail on my phone

Cause losing you once already hurt enough

What’s wrong with me, Mom?

Why didn’t I break down?

You spent your whole life

Keeping us safe somehow

You gave and gave till there was

Nothing left to lose

So what’s wrong with me

That I didn’t think of you?

Maybe love ain’t measured

By one Sunday every year

Maybe grief gets quiet

When the memories stay near

Maybe you became so much a part of me

I carry you around without even realizing

Maybe that’s why your smile

Still stops me in my tracks

Why I still reach for the phone

Before remembering you can’t call back

There’s nothing wrong with me, Mom

I think I know now

You loved me so completely

You never really left somehow

You’re in the way I hold my children

In every hard-earned truth

And maybe on Mother’s Day

I was loving them like you taught me to

I still miss you, Mom

Every single day

Even if I forgot

To say it on Mother’s Day

And I still can’t erase

That message on my phone

Cause some things in this world

Still sound too much like home