Lonely first

You showed up when your nights were empty

When the silence got too loud

You said my name like a confession

Like you finally figured it out

You held me like you meant forever

Said things you didn’t think through

But the second your chest felt lighter

You were halfway gone already, weren’t you

You weren’t loving me

You were lonely first

I carried you

You caught your breath

Guess who it hurt

You don’t have to plan to use someone

To do it clean

You just stopped hurting

And forgot about me

You said slow like it made you honest

Like caution made you kind

But slow was just a way to keep me

On the edge of your mind

You pulled me close, then punished closeness

Called it fear, called it truth

Funny how your walls went up

The minute I needed you

You weren’t loving me

You were lonely first

I gave you peace

I gave you space

I paid in full

You don’t have to ghost or burn it down

To let it die

Just stop showing up

When you’re satisfied

You weren’t loving me

You were lonely first

I confused your relief

With something real

I won’t stay where I’m convenient

Till the ache is gone

I won’t be your almost

I won’t be your almost

I’m gone

If you ever say my name

Like I disappeared

I was there when you were empty

Not when you were clear