Please Stop Counting On Me

(Intro - spoken word)
“I’m really tired of this shit! Why the fuck do I do this to myself?! I stay clean, and then I just fuck it up again! FUCK It’s exhausting!!”

(Verse 1)
Packed the bags, told myself it’s the last time
Threw the pills down the sink, drew a hard line
Three days clean, I can feel my heart beat
Looking in the mirror, standing on my own two feet
But the air feels thin and the walls are closing in
And a whisper says "where have you been?"
It’s a roadblock, a detour, a sudden U-turn
Just a little taste, I thought I could learn....

(Chorus)
And I’m falling again, down the same old stairs
Trading my soul for a moment that never repairs
It’s a broken promise, a shattered dream
Trying to swim in a freezing stream
Round and round, the cycle brings me low
Trying hard, but I don't know how to let go.

(Verse 2)
Can’t count the fingers on my own hand
Texts from you that I don’t understand
Said I’d meet you there, and I’d be okay
But I’m too wasted for a social mistake 
I’m fighting with demons who make
Every decision of my living day
Just please stop counting on me
(Please stop counting on me)

(Chorus)
And I’m falling again, down the same old stairs
Trading my soul for a moment that never repairs
It’s a broken promise, a shattered dream
Trying to swim in a freezing stream
Round and round, the cycle brings me low
Trying hard, but I don't know how to let go.

(Bridge)
They say one day at a time, well I made it an hour!
I can’t fight the urge and I lost my power
I close my eyes, and I’m back at the start
Everything inside of me is falling apart
I want to breathe, I want to fight 
But I keep falling deeper, every fucking night!

(Chorus - Softly, acoustic)
Ohhh And I’m falling again, down the same old stairs
Trading my soul for a moment that never repairs
It’s a broken promise, a shattered dream
Trying to swim in a freezing stream
Round and round, the cycle brings me low
Trying hard, but I don't know how to let go.

(Outro)
But I don't know how to let go.
Just one more time...
But I don't know how to let go.
One more time...
Ohhhh one more time!!
I can’t hide!!!
Mmm I don't know how to let go
Just please stop counting on me

Melodic rap, acoustic guitar, drug addiction, intensely emotional, male, immense personal struggle