[Verse 1]
On the first cool swing of Christmas
My true love grooved to me
A partridge [scat: ba-da] in a pear tree
Snapping at the pipers
Flapping at the drummers
“Keep it down, this branch is my VIP”
[Verse 2]
On the second smooth night of Christmas
Two turtle doves flew free
They coo round the partridge
Circle in the pear tree
“Share that top branch, spotlight hog”
“Fine, but keep it in key”
[Verse 3]
Third mellow day of Christmas
Three French hens cut in
Berets and tiny sunglasses
They strut and spin
They side-eye the turtle doves
Shove the partridge off the limb
“Room for talent only
We came here to win”
[Chorus]
These are my twelve jazzy days of Christmas
Everybody fighting for the solo line
Birds, girls, rings, and all that business
Turning this carol to a late-night shine
They play, they push, they slide, they spin
But the groove keeps pulling them back again
Twelve jazzy days of Christmas
All my chaos keeps perfect time
[Verse 4]
Fourth late show Christmas
Four calling birds on the phone
Gossip in the green room
Tea spilled, feathers thrown
They prank-call the French hens
Order seeds in their name
Partridge laughs so hard
He forgets his own refrain
[Verse 5]
On the fifth wild jam of Christmas
Five gold rings go bling
They roll ‘cross the stage
Do a little brass swing
They loop round the bird legs
Trip hens on the floor
Turtle doves skate through
And slide into the door
[Verse 6]
Six geese on the sixth day
Laying eggs on the beat
Eggs bounce like bright white marbles
All over the seats
They juggle with the gold rings
Heckle from the pit
“Partridge, hit that high note!”
He squeaks, can’t commit
[Verse 7]
Seventh smoky evening Christmas
Seven swans all a-swim
In a kiddie pool backstage
Too fancy to mix in
They splash the calling birds
Drench the geese in the wings
“Darling, we do ballet
Not these rowdy things”
[Chorus]
[Chorus]
[Verse 8]
Eighth blue-note Christmas
Eight maids step and sway
Milking laughs from everybody
As they slide their pails away
They moonwalk through the bird brawl
Spin past the gold rings too
“Share the spotlight, featherheads
We got footwork to do”
[Verse 9]
On the ninth bright bop of Christmas
Nine ladies dance in time
They spin the maids like records
Snap on every line
They cut off the gossip birds
Shout “Hush, feel the groove!”
Even swans start splashing rhythm
Can’t help but move
[Verse 10]
Tenth jam-packed Christmas
Ten lords leap on the stage
Big boots, high knees
Stealing all the front-page
They jump over the egg shells
Nearly crush the rings
Partridge dives to save them
While the French hens sing
[Verse 11]
Eleventh smoky chorus Christmas
Eleven pipers join the show
Each one playing different tunes
What a tangled flow
They blast through the geese notes
Drown the calling birds
Till the swans hiss “Harmony!”
“Use your ears, not just words!”
[Verse 12]
Twelfth loud night of Christmas
Twelve drummers drum in rows
Kicks, rolls, fills, thrills
Shaking feathers, hair, and bows
Birds squawk “Too loud!”
Pipers push back “Too soft!”
Lords leap, ladies spin
Whole stage lifts off
[Bridge]
Then the partridge clears his throat
[low vocal register] “Alright, listen up to me”
“Geese, share the downbeat
Swans, take the melody
Pipers, find a pocket
Drummers, drop it clean
Maids and ladies, dance it
Lords, jump in between
Rings,