Crawling to the Light

[Verse 1]
I used to sleep
With a Bible on my chest
Now it’s buried in the closet
Under T‑shirts and regret
I’ve been staring at the ceiling
Like it might spell out Your name
But the plaster just keeps cracking
Saying nothing
Staying same
[Chorus]
I’m crawling to the light
With my fists still clenched
My teeth still tight
Can You hear me break?
Can You hear me break?
I’m bleeding out these prayers I don’t believe
Screaming for a God that won’t speak
But I still reach
I still reach
[Verse 2]
Every Sunday was a promise
Every song a safety net
Now the choir in my ribcage
Only sings of what I’ve lost
Not what I get
I throw questions at the ceiling
’Til my throat tastes like a wound
But the silence in this bedroom
Feels louder than the choir ever could
[Chorus]
I’m crawling to the light
Dragging all my shame into the sky
Can You hear me break?
Can You hear me break?
I’m spitting out the verses I was taught
Cursing every breath
Every cross
But I still reach
I still reach (why do I still reach?)
[Bridge]
[Music drops
Vocal close and raw]
Did You see me on the bathroom floor?
Hands shaking like a child at the door
Saying
“If You’re there
If You’re there
Say something
Say anything”
[Band crashes in
Harsh screams]
WHY DID YOU LEAVE WHEN I NEEDED YOU MOST?
(DID YOU LEAVE? DID YOU LEAVE?)
OR WERE YOU NEVER THERE
JUST A GHOST?
(JUST A NAME, JUST A HOPE!)
I’M SO TIRED OF PRAYING TO THE DARK
BUT I CAN’T KILL THIS PILGRIM IN MY HEART
[Chorus]
I’m crawling to the light
Eyes wide open
I don’t trust the shine
Can You hear me break?
Can You hear me break?
If I tear Your picture from the wall
Will the echo even notice at all?
’Cause I still reach
I still reach
[Outro]
[Instruments thin out
Almost spoken]
I used to sleep
With a Bible on my chest
Now I lie here in the quiet
Daring You to answer
One last breath
One last bet
On a God I can’t forgive
That I can’t forget

Emotional post-hardcore, male vocals: fragile clean guitar intro exploding into half-time, wide distorted walls, and pounding toms. Verses start almost whispered then crack into strained mid-screams; chorus is soaring but frayed around the edges with gang shouts on key phrases. Bridge collapses into chaotic, desperate screams over sparse chords, then a final, slightly lifted chorus with octave guitars and roomy crash cymbals, ending on a choked, cut-off ring., emotional, light, post-hardcore