THE ONE HE LET GO

Intro – soft, almost hopeful, distant room tone]

I still wake up

Like it’s over

I still check the locks at night

Still count my breaths in threes

But the screams don’t live here anymore

Just quiet memories

They told me I was lucky

Said I beat the odds

Said some people don’t get out

I guess I’m one who does

They never said why

They just said run

And I did

I’m the one he let go

That’s what they say

The proof that monsters slip

And plans can break

Detective Dan said I was safe

Looked me dead in the face

Said it was done

Said I was saved

I gave a statement, shook a little

Hands still wouldn’t stay still

They said time would smooth the edges

That fear eventually will

Dan checked in a couple times

Asked if I was holding up

I said yeah, I’m sleeping fine

I lied just enough

I never asked

Why I lived

I didn’t want the answer

I’m the one he let go

I tell myself

That someone slipped

That he lost control

I wear survival like a badge

Like it means something real

Like being alive

Means I didn’t kneel

Sometimes I wonder

Late at night

Why he stopped

Why I wasn’t next

Sometimes I swear

I hear a choice

In the silence

I left unchecked

I’m the one he let go

And I don’t know why

Everyone says I survived

But no one says how

If this was mercy

It feels wrong

Like I was spared

Just to live this long

Dan…

If you hear this

I tried to be okay