My Pet Ego

[verse 1 - intimate, close, dry vocal, minimal beat underneath] I've got this little creature that lives behind my eyes narrates everything I do files a full report on every sensation I didn't ask for a full report but here we are

barks at strangers, barks at mirrors barks at things that happened in 2004

[chorus 1 - layers build, beat drops in, warm and weird, vocal doubles] my pet ego always moaning, always groaning always giving me shit I've been giving it treats my whole life and it still has diarrhea at the most inconvenient times you know how it is

[verse 2 - beat stays, vocals dry again, slight tension building] demands empathy does not provide empathy very concerned with other people's business completely unaware of its own funk

honestly it's exhausting being this

hair trigger survival instinct gone haywire sometimes chases its own tail sometimes tries to bite its own teeth it's not always clear what the plan is

[chorus 2 - fuller than chorus 1, more layered, slightly unhinged] my pet ego always moaning, always groaning always giving me shit I've been giving it treats my whole life and it still has diarrhea at the most inconvenient times

[verse 3 - strip back, pulse only, very intimate] it chases the thing gets the thing sniffs it once already looking for the next thing very committed to arriving arrives constantly at the same place it was so sure this time it built entire structures around the feeling staying

[pause - everything drops, single note] okay sweetheart I know

[bridge - sparse, tender, almost dissolving] I know what it is I just can't stop feeding it I know there's something quieter just past all this noise I almost got there once I think

[outro - minimal, ambient, breathing, barely there] one day the light came in different and I saw it clear and small curled up in the corner, finally resting and I thought — oh is that all and something in me opened not away from it around it

and it breathed out and so did I and I didn't stop loving it I just stopped being it

[final line - naked, no production, just voice] bless its heart