Back and Forth

I’m wearing these old black jeans

They don’t fit like they did at 19

Same posters on my cracked wall

Same numbers I still don’t call

Haven’t cleaned up in weeks

Smells like sweat and old memories

Scroll my feed but I hate it all

Everybody’s grown while I’m still small

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I’m stuck in the past like it’s safer there

Bleach my hair just to not care

Laugh too loud so I won’t cry

Lie to myself that I’m still that guy

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I’m stuck in 2015

Lost kid chasing dead dreams

But clarity hits me hard

It’s 2025, I’m falling apart

Time don’t wait, it just moves

I’m the ghost in an old room

Flash of now and it burns my eyes

Then I’m back to 2015 in my mind

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Same playlist on repeat

Smoke in my lungs, can’t breathe

I talk shit like I’m bulletproof

But I’m older now and that’s the truth

I see my friends with their lives planned

I’m still scribbling in my shaking hands

Never learned how to let things go

Guess I’m scared of what I don’t know

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I’m stuck in the past cause it feels like home

Sleeping on floors just to not feel alone

Smile in pics but I’m dead behind

Wishing I could leave that year behind

⸻

I’m stuck in 2015

Lost kid chasing dead dreams

But clarity hits me hard

It’s 2025, I’m falling apart

Time don’t wait, it just moves

I’m the ghost in an old room

Flash of now and it burns my eyes

Then I’m back to 2015 in my mind

⸻

Sometimes I see it all so clear

Lines on my face, regrets appear

Drink to forget but it’s no use

The years I lost won’t come back new

I’m screaming at the mirror now

Who the fuck am I anyhow?

Twenty-five or fifteen still

Chasing something I can’t feel

⸻

I’m stuck in 2015

Lost kid chasing dead dreams

But clarity hits me hard

It’s 2025, I’m falling apart

Time don’t wait, it just moves

I’m the ghost in an old room

Flash of now and it burns my eyes

Then I’m back to 2015 in my mind

⸻

Back and forth, I can’t decide

If I wanna grow up or just hide

Wake up older every time

But I’m stuck in 2015 in my mind