Now you know why

You wanna know why I did it?

Why I crossed the line?

Why I came home smelling like somebody else

And couldn't look you in the eye?

You wanna know why I stopped coming home before the sun went down?

Why I found somebody else's arms when yours weren't reaching out?

You remembered when I called you just to hear you say my name?

You remember how many times you turned away?

How I stopped being your husband and started being part of the room?

You were sleeping beside me, but I was sleeping alone with you.

I'm not saying I'm right.

I'm not saying you made me do it.

I made that choice myself.

But if you're gonna ask why...

Now you know why I cheated.

Now you know where I went.

I was starving for a little love in the house where we once had it.

Every "not tonight," every cold goodbye, every time you made me feel invisible, killed another piece of mine.

I should've walked away.

I should have told you the truth.

But I found somebody who looked at me the way I used to look at you.

You remember those Friday nights you'd make plans without me?

I'd sit at home with an empty chair and a bottle of Tennessee.

You'd tell your friends I'm jealous, tell 'em I was hard to love.

But you never told them how long I'd been giving up.

Then she came along and asked me how my day had been.

She laughed at my stupid jokes and made me feel like a man again.

I knew the second that I kissed her, I was doing something wrong.

But damn, it felt good to finally feel wanted after so long.

Now you know why I cheated.

Now you know where I went.

I was starving for a little love in the house where we once had it.

Every "not tonight," every cold goodbye, every time you made me feel invisible, killed another piece of mine.

I should have walked away.

I should have told you the truth.

But, I found somebody who looked at me the way I used to look at you.

But here's what you don't want to hear:

If you're looking for an excuse:

There ain't one.

I was hurt.

I was lonely.

I was angry.

I was weak.

But I still chose her.

So don't put all the blame on yourself, and don't put it all on me.

We both let something beautiful turn into something we couldn't see.

You stopped loving me out loud.

I stopped fighting for us inside.

You built the distance between us.

I found somebody on the other side.

Now you know why I cheated, and I know what it cost.

I traded everything we built for a moment I thought I'd lost.

You didn't deserve the betrayal.

I didn't deserve the way we died.

We both had a hand in breaking us, but only I can own my side.

So. If you ask me why I did it... It wasn't because she was better. It was because I was too afraid to leave and too broken to stay.

Now you know why.