(Verse 1)
I chased the bells of college halls, a future you could finally see
I thought if I could just stand tall, you’d walk the road back here to me.
I worked the jobs and burned the midnight oil, I bent my back in a thousand ways
To turn the barren, broken soil, and leave behind those miserable days.
But the summit was a shifting line, a cruel horizon I couldn't cross,
And every time I thought I was fine, I only measured up my loss.
(Pre-Chorus)
And every night for thirteen years, the dream would pull me back to sleep.
You’d reappear, drying my tears, a secret promise I could keep.
We’d talk of futures, warm and slow, the past undone, the hurt erased...
But when the morning sun would glow, I’d wake to an empty space.
I lost you over and over again.
(Chorus)
Oh, but you never saw the merit, only the dust the failures left.
You didn't see the broken spirit, the strength I used until bereft.
When you looked back, you saw the mess, and spoke your words of cold mockery.
You never knew my silent stress, the man I tried so hard to be.
My "nevermind, I'm sorry again" just wasn't enough to pay the cost,
And you were always out of my reach, like a ship on a shore I’d lost.
(Verse 2)
I tried to build a sanctuary, a world where your pride might bloom,
I climbed the peaks, a heavy quarry, to cut away the ancient gloom.
It felt like I was screaming loud, performing for an audience of one,
But you were hidden in the cloud, unaware of the race I’d run.
You saw the slips, the stumbles low, the empty hands, the fading light,
You never saw the seeds I'd sow, or the battles that I fought all night.
(Bridge)
I kept on moving, you moved on, the seasons changed, the wounds grew deep.
My yesterday became your dawn, a promise that I couldn't keep.
And now you walk on solid ground, beneath a sky that's clear and true.
While I am here, where I was found, stuck in the rain drowning in the mud for you.
Thirteen years and I'm still sinking...
(Chorus)
Oh, but you never saw the merit, only the dust the failures left.
You didn't see the broken spirit, the strength I used until bereft.
When you looked back, you saw the mess, and spoke your words of cold mockery.
You never knew my silent stress, the man I tried so hard to be.
My "nevermind, I'm sorry again" just wasn't enough to pay the cost,
And you were always out of my reach, like a ship on a shore I’d lost.
(Outro)
Thirteen years...
I tried, I tried... and you never saw.
Just the rain.
And the mud.
Philosophy11
