Yeah
Funny thing about rock bottom —
you can still get invoices there.
I’m sitting in a quiet house
After making school lunches
Checking tax debt numbers
Like they’re lottery punches
Fifty-fifty care
But the system says “pay”
So I smile at my daughters
Then I die a bit each day
ATO on my back
Child support through the roof
Everybody wants a cut
Till there’s nothing left to lose
And somehow I’m the villain
Cause I worked and declared
While people out here living free
Off numbers never shared
Meanwhile you’re overseas
Sunlight on your skin
Posting little captions
Like your life’s a movie scene
I’m here cooking chicken
At 7:15
Trying not to lose my mind
Over debit machine screens
And that dude in your comments?
Yeah I saw him too
Some ghost-account orbiting
Like he’s waiting on you
Funny — I don’t even want you back
That’s the truth
But disrespect still burns
When you gave someone your youth
I used to numb pain
Now I deadlift it instead
Still awake at 1 am
With a war inside my head
Flight sim in VR
Just to leave my own life
Then I land and realise
Nothing’s changed overnight
Cause escape is escape
Whether powder or pixels
Doesn’t matter what the drug is
When your soul’s in the middle
And I know that now
That’s the fucked up part
I became self-aware
While falling apart
But I still get up
Still train when I’m sore
Still answer the emails
Still walk through the door
Still hug my girls
Still cook dinner at night
Even when every damn cell says
“Chris, stop fighting”
See people think strength
Is some loud alpha sound
But real strength’s quiet
When nobody’s around
It’s paying what you owe
When life feels rigged
Not becoming the monster
Just because you’ve been hit
So nah —
I’m not healed
I’m not good
I’m not zen
I’m just a tired man
Trying not to break again
But one thing I know
As the smoke clears away —
I’m better off without you anyway.
Greyline
