Hand on the Latch

I was raised in the echo

Where every voice became a rule

Fear wore the clothes of wisdom

And obedience looked good on you

So I bent to keep the peace

Let the world decide my name

Till I looked into the mirror

And barely knew my face

I learned to smile on cue

Learned to vanish just enough

Called it love, called it goodness

Called it being strong

But there’s a cost to going quiet

To becoming what they ask

You can lose yourself so slowly

You don’t know till looking back

Chorus

Now I only bow to what is true

Only give what I believe

I’ve been carrying other people

I won’t hand them all of me

Call it freedom, call it fire

Call it coming back at last

I was never meant to live

Without my hand on the latch

There were prisons with no bars

Only habits dressed like faith

Only stories I kept serving

Long after they had changed

Every time I left myself

Something in me faded out

Not because the world was cruel

I just forgot my way back out

Now I know the sound of warning

I know the weight of borrowed shame

I know fear can wear a halo

And still ask me to disappear

I’m done confusing silence

With being good or being strong

I’m done calling self-erasure

Somewhere I belong

Chorus

Now I only bow to what is true

Only give what I believe

I’ve been carrying other people

I won’t hand them all of me

Call it healing, call it waking

Call it seeing through the dark

I was never meant to live

With someone else inside my heart

Bridge

I don’t need to fight the whole world

Just to stand inside my name

I don’t need to lose my softness

Just to stop giving me away

There’s a voice beneath the noise now

And I hear it clear at last

Every step I take is mine now

With my hand on the latch

Final Chorus

Now I only bow to what is true

Only love the way I mean

I will not trade my deepest center

For approval dressed as peace

Let the world be full of pressure

Let it ask what I won’t have

I was never meant to live

Without my hand on the latch