Not high enough

I can’t get high enough to get you out my mind

I can’t get high enough to get her away from your side

I see it when I close my eyes.

She’s there, I’m here,

you swear shes nowhere

I know you lie

in bed with her

with me not high enough to not see

it when I close my eyes. She’s there, you lied, my mind on fire, my body aches, you’re the liar.

I thought we had the perfect thing, I thought you had the perfect ring. But tonight here on Christmas Eve I sit not high enough to breathe

I’m drowning slow in silent screams

Lit up the tree, but killed my dreams

Our song still plays, it cuts like glass

You promised me this pain would pass

You’re holding her with hands I kissed

And I’m stuck choking on what I miss

The smoke just fades, it won’t erase

The picture of her in my place

I can’t get high enough to blur the truth

You’re hers in ways you swore were mine too

Each hit just hurts, each breath’s a fight

She haunts your eyes, she steals my nights

And here I sit on Christmas Eve

Still not high enough to leave

Stockings hung on broken hopes

I trace your name in ashes, smoke

I begged the stars to take this sting

But stars don’t shine when hearts don’t sing

I can’t get numb enough to sleep

Can’t dream a world where you don’t cheat

You say it’s love—then tell me why

I’m not the one you hold tonight