(Verse 1)
He talks about boys with fire in his eyes
And I play the part, nod and laugh like I’m fine
But I’m not—I’m rehearsing “I love you”
In between “bro” and “what we up to?”
I’m the girl who fades in his type
But I’d still cross that line in Nikes or tights
I’d talk low, act cool, hide the gloss
Just to be the one he’s never lost
(Pre-Chorus)
He don’t know I dream in his cologne
Write poems I never show
He says “we’re close,” I smile wide
But I’m dying slow every time
(Chorus)
He likes boys, but I like him
So I shrink myself and bite my skin
Wanna be the secret he don’t expect
Even if I gotta break what makes me "her" next
He don’t even know, he don’t even guess
That I love him in ways I can’t confess
I’d be his if he asked tonight
Even if I have to blur what’s right
(Verse 2)
He calls me “homie,” “ride or die”
While I Google “how to change your type”
I play tough, say “same” when he talks
While my heart stutters in tiny shocks
I could be what he needs to feel
Bend the light, make the fake look real
Still a girl, but I’d drop the script
If it means I could make him slip
(Pre-Chorus)
He don’t know I skip my sleep
Play his laugh on endless repeat
He’s the boy I’d rewrite the rules for
But he sees me like the floor
(Chorus)
He likes boys, but I like him
So I sharpen my voice and slim my limbs
Wear baggy fits, talk like him too
Just to live in the edge of his view
He don’t even know, he don’t even care
That I’d trade my truth just to be his dare
I’d be his if he asked tonight
Even if it means losing my light
(Bridge – soft, airy, Britney-style spoken)
I know it’s wrong to wish
But I still blow it out like a birthday wish
Maybe he’ll turn
Maybe he’ll burn
Maybe one day he’ll look and learn
(Final Chorus)
He likes boys, but I’m still here
In his shadow, tasting my own fear
I’d be anyone, anything, all in
Just to feel like I could win
He don’t even know I love him still
With all this hurt I’d die to feel
He don’t see me, but I glow—
I’m the girl he’ll never know
