[Verse 1]
Alarm buzz
heart racing fast
Got Kim sleeping peaceful
I’m pacing past
Got bills in a stack
like they waiting to laugh
If the cards fall wrong
who’s breaking the crash
Little Elijah on the tablet
asks “Daddy, you okay?”
I say “yeah, I’m just tired”
but my chest in the way
Malachi in his Spider-Man PJs
jumping on my leg
I’m smiling for the selfie
head heavy like lead
Had a father that vanished
and a mother that prayed
Grew up watching past-due
not the cartoons played
Swore my sons never see
that eviction tape
But the more I climb ladders
the more the rungs shake
[Chorus]
I got pressure on my back
but I carry it (yeah)
Doing laps in my mind
can’t bury it
For my wife, for my boys
I ain’t barely here
I’m a rock in the rain
even scared, I’m here
This for Jayvon, for Kim
for Elijah and Malachi
When the weight feel heavy
we gon’ still get by
Every breath feel tight
but I stand on love
All this pressure on my back
getting handed up
[Verse 2]
Scrolling through the job posts
over cold-ass fries
Boss texting on my off day
“Need you overtime”
Trying to save for a crib
and a newer ride
But I’m trading in my peace
every Uber drive
Kim saying, “You don’t talk,
you just go get paid”
She can tell I’m in a storm
by the face I make
I don’t know how to say
that I’m low and afraid
‘Cause my uncles said “man up”
when the tears would wave
I got panic in my jacket
like a hidden gun
Heart jump
every time that the first of the month come
Smile for the church pic
smile for my mom
Then I sit up in the dark
asking, who am I become
[Chorus]
I got pressure on my back
but I carry it
Doing laps in my mind
can’t bury it
For my wife, for my boys
I ain’t barely here
I’m a rock in the rain
even scared, I’m here
This for Jayvon, for Kim
for Elijah and Malachi
When the weight feel heavy
we gon’ still get by
Every breath feel tight
but I stand on love
All this pressure on my back
getting handed up
[Bridge]
If I say “I’m not fine”
will they look at me strange (look at me)
If I take off this armor
will they see my shame
But my sons need a man
who can name his pain
So I’m breathing in slow
trying to break this chain
Told Kim, “I been drowning
in the shallow end”
She said, “Boy, you my husband
not a cash machine”
Laid my head on her chest
heard a softer drum
Maybe loving myself
how the war gets won
[Chorus]
I got pressure on my back
but I carry it
Doing laps in my mind
can’t bury it
For my wife, for my boys
I ain’t barely here
I’m a rock in the rain
even scared, I’m here
This for Jayvon, for Kim
for Elijah and Malachi
When the weight feel heavy
we gon’ still get by
Every breath feel tight
but I stand on love
All this pressure on my back
getting handed up