[Verse 1 – Little Welsh Menace]
Used to leg it from teachers like it was the Olympics,
Flipped off the headmaster, called him “mate,” caused diagnostics.
Set off alarms in Tesco just for the thrill,
Chucked stones at signs on top of the hill.
Yeah, I was the kid with the attitude problem deluxe,
Chaos in a hoodie, zero shits to give — just vibes and bad luck.
[Pre-Chorus – Sarcastic Awakening]
But look at me now, behaving like an adult (kind of),
Paying bills, drinking water, not acting mindless.
Even my nan’s like, “bloody hell, is that YOU?”
Yeah, fair play — I’m shocked too.
[Chorus – Big, Loud, Funny as Hell]
I used to be a nightmare — proper Welsh gremlin,
Now I’m out here doing life like someone who’s actually listenin’.
Head’s on straight, path’s not bent,
Tax paid on time — that’s 100% (a miracle event).
I’m no longer a screw-up, I’m sensible-ish,
Who’d have thought the naughty kid
Would turn into this?
Yeah, life’s weird, innit—
But fair play, I’m smashing it.
[Verse 2 – The Glow-Up No One Predicted]
Once stole a traffic cone ‘cause it “looked at me wrong,”
Got banned from Asda for a week — wasn’t even that long.
Used to tell coppers “I’m allergic to rules,”
Walked around acting like I invented being cool.
But now I drink tea without starting a fight,
Go to bed before midnight —
WHAT A SIGHT.
[Pre-Chorus – Laughing at the Past]
Yeah, younger me would kick my shins for this behaviour,
But older me’s like “pfft, responsibility? Do me a favour.”
Still, I show up, try hard, sort my own shit,
Turns out stability isn’t that bad — who’d have predicted it?
[Chorus – Louder, Funnier, Full Welsh Chaos]
I used to be a menace — a tiny hurricane,
Now I’m shockingly normal (well… normal for Wales, anyway).
Head’s screwed on, not smashing up bins,
No longer giving random adults evil grins.
A grown-up now (apparently),
No more running wild through the valley.
Yeah, I’m changed — bloody legit.
Not bad for someone who used to eat chaos for breakfast
And trouble for a bit.
[Bridge – Punk Breakdown, Welsh Humour]
Shoutout to the teachers who said I’d end in jail,
Sorry babes — I lived long enough to prove you failed.
I’m still a gremlin at heart, just mildly upgraded,
Now my chaos is organised — professionally orchestrated.
[Final Chorus – Full Explosion of Comedy + Punk]
I was the kid with no respect,
No rules followed, none expected.
Now I’m stable, tidy, doing bits —
Life’s mad, innit?
Got my head on straight, no longer throwing fits,
No longer a screw-up —
fair play, I’ve earned my credits.
From naughty kid to grown-up legit,
Look at me now —
I’m thriving,
AND I pay council tax.
How’s that for grit?
Rhiann Griffiths 
