LOVING YOU IN SILENCE

I wish I was normal, not this weak,

Not drowning everytime I feel too deep.

I wish my heart didn't hurt my mind,

That loving you wouldn't make me blind.

If I were stronger, if I were whole,

I would love you loudly through every storm.

But right now I'm sick, I'm barely okay,

Trying to survive, not fade away.

I love you in silence, it tears me apart,

My mind is my enemy, my heart is my scar.

I choose my future, I choose to endure,

But choosing myself, feels cruel and unsure.

How sad is it- this kind of love,

So close, yet never enough.

If loving you means loosing me,

Then silence is my only mercy.

I love you, Mon Sos Teps...

Just quietly in my heart.