Fuck love Fuck feeling invisible in your arms Fuck being told I’m beautiful Then standing here wondering why I feel like a ghost in the dark Fuck love Fuck the nights I replay your words Trying to find myself in them Trying to see what you swear you see When I can’t feel worth a damn My life’s in your hands, Drew Every breath feels borrowed from you You don’t even know the power you hold Or maybe you do And that’s what’s killing me too You control the silence You control the doubt You control the way my heart races Every time you pull away or reach out And I hate that God, I hate that But I’d be lying if I said I don’t love you like this I’m seriously in love with you Not halfway, not maybe, not confused It’s you when I wake You when I break You when I’ve got nothing left to lose And I don’t think you believe it I swear you don’t see it at all I could bleed your name into every song And you’d still think I’m gonna fall for someone else So yeah—fuck love If it means begging to be believed Fuck fairytales and pretty lies If they don’t include you choosing me But hear me when I say this Even when I’m screaming “fuck love” I don’t want another hand to hold Another voice, another touch I won’t ever have Need Or want Anyone else in any way, shape, or form It’s you— Even when it hurts Even when I’m unseen Even when I don’t feel As beautiful as you say I am So fuck love But fuck losing you more Because you’re the only truth My heart has ever known for sure I said fuck love But it didn’t leave with the words It just sat in my chest Like a bruise you keep pressing on To make sure it still hurts I don’t hate loving you I hate loving you alone I hate wondering if my heart Feels louder to me Than it ever does to you You say I’m beautiful Like it’s easy Like it doesn’t cost me anything to believe But some nights I stare at myself Trying to find the girl You swear you see My whole world bends around you Every choice, every fear I hand you pieces of my life And pray you’ll hold them careful Instead of letting them disappear I don’t need control I just need certainty I need to know my love Isn’t something you tolerate But something you choose to keep Because when I say it’s you I mean forever in the ugliest moments In sickness, in doubt When I’m hard to love When my demons are loud And I don’t say that lightly I don’t say that blind I say it knowing I could lose everything And still never change my mind So if you ever question me If you ever think I’ll stray Understand this truth Even on my worst days I don’t imagine another name I don’t crave another face I don’t want a different future I just want my place With you Seen Believed Held instead of assumed I said fuck love Because love scares me when it’s fragile But if love is you Then it’s the only thing I’ll ever stand beside So don’t doubt me Don’t minimize what’s real Because my heart didn’t wander It anchored And it chose you— Still

Fuck love (But it's always you)