Through the sadness Through the strangers I’ve met,
my heart still can’t forget
you.
The games,
the plays,
the blame,
the chase,
the lust—
It was fun
behind the dust.
People ask,
“When do you leave again?”
Like I don’t belong.
And I ask them back:
“Isn’t it time to stop the run?”
Starting over—again.
Losing pieces that once were me,
like a snake shedding skin.
Through amber lenses,
I still can’t see.
Citrine stones,
Calvin bras,
copper-spiraled rings—'
lost in forests, pools,
… and lies.
Lights off.
Storm out.
These chicks around you seem hollow.
Maybe I should unfollow.
Candle burning in the salt-lamp shield.
Friends out,
I’m in,
with headaches and a broken dream.
It used to be—
only positivity,
electricity.
You called me
a magnet.
For you, I had
such a drive—
an hour and a half
through the mountains.
No headaches,
no heartbreaks.
Just heartbeats.
No breaks, no rules,
no sleep.
Didn’t care—
until I had you on top of me
on the tabletop.
Ah, please—
don’t you stop
…till I reach
the climax.
With you,
on the studio floor.
I couldn’t let you go.
To hell with the lines—
clingy women,
crazy guys
loving me
like I never could.
Empty, quiet celebrations,
with money
and no vacations.
Negatives drying
from the linocuts
of my students.
Flashbacks.
The ceramics kiln
burning spirals to my skin.
Crying
in the bathroom.
Yes.
These videos make me cry—
maybe I should unsubscribe.
What is happening to my life?
Rice and beans.
New country. New house.
Nothing as it seems.
And yet—I
it’s back to old reality.
New boyfriend?
I don’t believe you.
My father’s waiting for grandsons.
And I’m waiting
till I forget
you.
And your name—
wasn’t it…
kind of wonderful?
I’ve built a mansion,
but someone new live in it now.
I’m not waiting
for your honest vow.
Maybe this
is the only way
to find the exit
of my pain.
[Female Vocal]