Silent Wires

Intro]

I been walking like a ghost inside my own apartment

I don’t talk to anyone - I don’t want involvement

I don’t know what happiness is, I think I lost it

and I don’t know if anybody’s noticed I’m exhausted…

I’m the punchline when I tell ’em that I’m hurting deep

they say “pray on it,” like God gon’ text me in my sleep

I wish emotions had a manual so I could read

how to escape this feeling of choking while I breathe

I’m addicted to regret like it’s a habit I can’t kick

I’m trapped inside a mind that wants to split me like a wishbone stick

I write pages full of pain but nobody’s listening

they just scroll like “he’s dramatic,” then they laugh and keep on giggling

Eminem taught me how to bleed ink into a notebook

Hopsin taught me how to fight demons when the soul shook

but even both of them combined can’t fix this broke look

in the mirror staring at me like an abandoned old book

I don’t wanna die…

but I don’t wanna live like this either

it feels like every time I pull myself up

I just fall back deeper

I’m yelling but nobody hears me

I’m fading like a signal through the speakers

I swear I don’t wanna die

I just wanna feel alive again, even if it’s weaker…

I got suicide drafts in my notes I never send

I got trauma stitched into every childhood memory that bends

I got people who assume that I’m fine because I grin

but I been dying undercover like a spy inside my skin

I’m a sad punchline in a world full of comedians

a poet who can’t talk ’cause his soul is full of obsidian

I’m hollow in the chest like a missing piece of circuitry

glitches in my brain like the devil keeps murdering me

my confidence is missing like a file in a corrupt drive

every effort that I make is just proof I ain’t enough live

so tell me why I’m forced to fight a war I never picked

tell me why my heart is heavy like an anchor from a ship

I don’t wanna die…

but I don’t wanna live like this either

it feels like every time I pull myself up

I just fall back deeper

I’m yelling but nobody hears me

I’m fading like a signal through the speakers

I swear I don’t wanna die

I just wanna feel alive again, even if it’s weaker…

this isn’t a cry for attention

this is a cry because I can’t speak

this is the truth I never mention

when everybody asks why I’m so weak

I’m just a damaged human being

begging to find one person who won’t leave…