BOOF:
BOOF
I'm honestly losing my shit I just don't know how to accept the fact that you're no longer here
tears flow like a river especially
when I write to you
I'm trying so hard to do the right thing in life
but honestly
I don't know what's right or wrong anymore
my body's really sore
I've been working every single day
I take no days off
just to fill that void
every night I can't sleep because not having you here anymore fills my thoughts
im constantly having panic attacks and anxiety attacks all day and every day I love you bro
but missing you is the worst parts of my days
I'm trying all kinds of ways to cope but haven't figured it out yet that's all for now I have a little something for you so here it goes
Hey Bro,
I'm having these thoughts, you know?
Honestly i dont know what
im doing any more.
I really have to understand
that your not here no more.
Feels like my heart and soul has no where to go.
This wasn't supposed to happen homie.
i think this is what finally broke me.
I believe
the devil choked me out,
and God just turn his back and said "Zack this is for you to figure out".
I fell to my knees
I couldn't fucking breathe
The day we said our goodbyes,
was the worse day of my life.
Knife in the stomach hurts so bad.
Like the day when we all lost dad
I was in shock didn't know what to say... cuz the shit happened 3 days after my birthday.
I've been losing myself more and more each an everyday.
I'm so lost can't find my way.
it really sucks bro cuz idek which way to go.....
No worries brotha I'm here to fill your shoes wanna know what's crazy
ever since that day you passed everybody says
I remind them of you.
friends
family
even people I aint ever seen
to say it's crazy that i feel like I'm going insane but anyways
Wanna know what this really comes down too.
I really really miss you my dude...
And when my times is up
imma come up there and I'll be standing right next to you.
OH YEA!! Haha I almost forgot...
So I bought a new Detroit hat
it reminds me of you.
I know this cuz
if u was right here buddy u would love it too .
This is all my fault
I will admit to it all
he called and called so many times
I just ignored it
cause I figured he had just done too much ice
little did I know he had no drugs at all that night honestly he 360 turned his life around
and it was Jesus that he found
seriously he was doing so good he turn down anything on sight
shit he must have been doing something right.
all night he was been saying he wasn't feeling right
it's just like yesterday we was kids and riding our bikes
every day we're going outside to play until the night falls
Or til mom yells for us
BOYS ITS DINNER TIME!!!
may he rest peacefully
I'd rather see that than his demons causing more pain and suffering .
once he was buried in the ground my purpose in life
follow me now we going to get people like us to speak and reach out
please seek the help you need plz no worries there is a lot like us you will see
