[Kris Kristofferson Style]
[Verse 1]
Somebody said I had passed away,
But I woke up breathing just fine today.
Checked the paper over my morning toast,
Didn’t find my name in the obits post.
I ain’t as strong as I used to be,
But I’m still here, least far as I can see.
[Verse 2]
Then Momma called just to verify,
Asked me what time the service was.
Said, “Lord, I ain’t got a dress to wear,
Guess I better wash my hair.”
And Daddy don’t own no Sunday suit,
But he’ll shine up his old work boots.
[Chorus]
I’m not dead—least far as I can tell,
But if I am, I hope you wish me well.
I ain’t the man I was before,
But I’m still standin’, maybe a little sore.
[Verse 3]
Then my friend Bob, he gave me a call,
Said, “If you’re gone, can I have it all?
I’ll take that pickup and your old guitar—
Man, you always played like a country star.
Oh, and about that money you owed—
Guess it’s best to let it go.”
[Bridge]
I’m still alive, least far as I can tell,
But if I’m wrong, you send me off well.
Tell Mary Lou I loved her so,
But don’t you let my old lady know.
[Tag / Outro]
I’m still upright, still on my feet,
Though the road’s a little rough and the hill’s a bit steep.
But if I’m gone, just dig a hole on my lawn,
Raise a glass and play one more song—
‘Cause I’m still here, far as I can tell.