[Intro]
(Beat: A heavy, metallic clink—like a dumbbell hitting the floor—followed by a fast beat)
(One! Two! Flex it, Luigi!)
"Are those... are those my five-pound weights?"
Yeah.
He’s not just a kid. He’s a powerhouse.
Check it.
[Verse 1]
(Beat: Staccato bassline, very "muscular" rhythm)
He’s doing push-ups in the middle of the kitchen floor
While I’m trying to bring the groceries through the door
He wants the "masculine" look, he wants the heavy chest
He’s doing bicep curls in his Sunday best
He’s stubborn as a mule, yeah, he’s got that Italian grit
He won't stop the training 'til he’s physically fit!
[Pre-Chorus]
(Beat: Tempo speeds up—sounds like a treadmill on high)
And my heart starts skipping (Skipping!)
The principal is tripping (Tripping!)
Every time he’s summoned, yeah, the school is flipping
He’s doing chin-ups on the office door move
Just tryna find his "beast-mode" groove!
Mamma Mia!
[Chorus]
(Beat: Huge, anthemic drop—heavy brass and a "pumping" beat)
Oh, Little King Luigi, you’re a wild one!
Training for the muscle 'til the day is done
A pocket full of salami and a desk full of mess
A little "macho" man, I have to confess!
(Whoa-oh-oh!)
Yeah, he’s nasty and he’s loud!
(Whoa-oh-oh!)
But Luigi makes his mama proud!
[Verse 2]
(Vocal: Rhythmic and cheeky)
He’s drinking protein shakes (it’s just chocolate milk)
With a soul made of iron and a heart made of silk
He told his teacher, "I don't have time for the math"
"I gotta hit the gym and follow the path"
He’s doing silly things, yeah, he’s making a scene
He’s the strongest seven-year-old the world’s ever seen!
[Bridge]
(Music: Everything drops out – just a pulsing bass and the sound of someone heavy breathing)
"Luigi... are you flexing in the mirror again?"
(Vocal: A massive, operatic, heroic belt)
YEAH, YOU’RE THE ONE!
THE WORKOUT’S NEVER DONE!
[Outro]
(The music goes into a high-speed "Rocky" style finish)
Luigi!
(Put the salami down and do ten more!)
The strongest kid in the principal's office.
(Yeah)
Basta! (Don't forget to stretch!)