[Verse 1]
I left the kitchen light on for you
Though you stopped coming home
A coffee ring beside the sink
The only proof I’m not alone
I count the cracks above my bed
Like dates I can’t erase
Every morning wears your shape
Then takes it from the room again
[Pre-Chorus]
I keep my hands beneath the water
Trying to feel something clean
But every little thing I bury
Comes back louder underneath
[Chorus]
I’m not okay, I’m just awake
Dragging my heart through another day
If I break, let it be honest
Let the pieces say your name
I’m so tired of pretending
There’s a cure behind my eyes
I’m not okay, but I’m still here
Even when I hate the fight
[Verse 2]
The hallway clock skips over two
Then stumbles into three
I read the message that you sent
And delete the part that says “believe”
My friends keep asking where I’ve been
I tell them I’ve been fine
Then lock the door and lose an hour
To the noise inside my mind
[Pre-Chorus]
I keep my hands beneath the water
Trying to feel something clean
But every little thing I bury
Comes back louder underneath
[Chorus]
I’m not okay, I’m just awake
Dragging my heart through another day
If I break, let it be honest
Let the pieces say your name
I’m so tired of pretending
There’s a cure behind my eyes
I’m not okay, but I’m still here
Even when I hate the fight
[Bridge]
Maybe healing isn’t silence
Maybe it’s admitting I’m afraid
Maybe asking for a hand to hold
Is not the same as being saved
So if you find me at the bottom
Don’t turn my pain into a crime
Sit beside me till the morning
Help me borrow back some time
[Final Chorus]
I’m not okay, but I’m awake
And that is more than yesterday
If I break, let it be honest
I won’t hide behind the ache
I’m still tired of pretending
But I can open up my eyes
I’m not okay, but I’m still here
And tonight, I choose the fight
[Outro]
I left the kitchen light on
Now I’m walking toward it slow