(Verse 1)
The bathroom light is flickering, a cold and clinical white,
I’ve been staring at the shower wall since the middle of the night.
My chest is tight, a physical weight, like a stone inside my ribs,
Rewatching every video, re-reading all the lies
I’m shaking like a circuit board that’s shorting in the rain,
Trying to find the oxygen through the static of the pain.
I check the clock, it’s nearly noon, I’ve missed the world again,
But I’ve gotta build a version of me that can handle being "just a friend."
(Pre-Chorus)
I stand, I wobble, feel the dizzy, searing flash,
But the face I’m painting on is meant to look so fresh.
I practice in the mirror, smooth the edges of the frown,
Gotta lock it down, lock it down, before I hit the town.
(Chorus)
Oh, this mask is my masterpiece, a flawless, plastic sheen,
Hiding the heartbreak glitch, the wreckage deep within!
I’m running on emergency power, pushing through the fire,
They see the girl who’s "moving on," but the pain is getting higher!
I want a future, a wide open space, a heart that doesn't strain,
But the weight of what I hide keeps dragging me back again.
My smile’s a total lie, it's a pop song on repeat,
'Cause this fight for "normal" is the cruelest kind of beat.
(Verse 2)
Forcing every muscle not to crumble when I walk.
The girls are asking questions, I’ve got all the right replies,
While I’m checking for the exit signs with desperate, hidden eyes.
I’m a ghost inside a body that’s still learning how to move,
Stuck inside the rhythm of this agonizing groove.
One mention of your name and then the makeup’s gonna run,
But I’m a masterpiece of fine until the damage is all done.
(Pre-Chorus)
I wipe a single tear away, before it hits the light,
Gotta polish up the armor, gotta make the smile look right.
(Chorus)
Oh, this mask is my masterpiece, a flawless, plastic sheen,
Hiding the heartbreak glitch, the wreckage deep within!
I’m running on emergency power, pushing through the fire,
They see the girl who’s "moving on," but the pain is getting higher!
I want a future, a wide open space, a heart that doesn't strain,
But the weight of what I hide keeps dragging me back again.
My smile’s a total lie, it's a pop song on repeat,
'Cause this fight for "normal" is the cruelest kind of beat.
(Bridge)
Tired of the act, tired of the "I’m okay,"
Watching every color start to fade to gray.
I'm scared of the future, scared of the cost,
Drowning in the middle of everything I lost.
Just one more minute to hide!
(Outro)
Running on empty, running on red,
Hiding the things that you should’ve never said.
The mask is on tight, looking so good,
A masterpiece of fine...
Until I turn out the light.