“I’m Still Here (Letter to God)

Hey God, it’s me again, just talking to the sky,

The beat-up version of myself who somehow still gets by.

Thanks for the sober days, the love that didn’t leave,

For the wife who lifts me up when I forget to breathe.

For the daughters, grandkids, music in my veins,

For the job that gives me purpose when the world feels strange.

I’m standing here stunned by the grace I still get,

Another chance at living when I thought I’d cashed the last of it.

So thank You for the mercy, thank You for the light,

Thank You for the mornings after all those broken nights.

But I’ve got questions in my pocket, and I know You hear them too—

I don’t need all the answers now, I just want to walk with You.

I’m trying, I’m open, I’m willing to be steered…

Help me find the truth I’m missing—

I’m still here.

I don’t understand the silence where my sons should be,

Why some wounds stay open, why they still echo in me.

Don’t know why the heart breaks the way the heart does,

Why timing never listens, why loss sticks like it does.

But maybe all these questions aren’t mine to solve tonight,

Maybe You unfold things slowly ’til the moment’s right.

I’m learning not to fight what I can’t comprehend,

Trusting You’ll explain it all when I can handle it, my friend.

So thank You for the mercy, thank You for the light,

Thank You for the mornings after all those broken nights.

And though I’m stumbling through the shadows with these questions You can hear—

I don’t need every answer now,

Just keep my heartbeat near.

I’m trying, I’m listening, I’m willing to be steered…

Help me do the work I owe You—

I’m still here.

If there’s something I should lay down,

Help me set it on the ground.

If there’s something I should rise to,

Give me strength to come around.

I don’t want perfection, Lord,

Just connection that is real—

Teach my heart to stay wide open,

Keep it soft enough to heal.

Thank You for the mercy, thank You for the light,

For the love that stayed beside me through the darkest fight.

I’m walking forward with my questions, but my hope’s becoming clear:

I’ll keep doing what You ask of me—

And You keep holding me near.

I’m trying, I’m learning, I’m grateful You’re so near…

This life You handed back to me—

I’m still here.