Verse 1
My cousin Jimmy Stevens is a Cowboys fan,
He’s been yelling “Super Bowl!” since God knows when.
Every year in August he’s got a brand-new plan,
By Thanksgiving he’s explaining it with charts and diagrams.
Chorus
Oh Jimmy, Jimmy, bless your heart,
Every season falls apart.
You buy the jersey, wave the flag,
Then spend January feeling sad.
But next year comes and there you stand—
The most optimistic man in the land!
Verse 2
Jimmy painted stars all over his pickup truck,
Says, “This year’s different!” with ridiculous luck.
He’s got Cowboys blankets, Cowboys socks, Cowboys shades,
I think the man’s got Cowboys underwear tucked away.
Chorus
Oh Jimmy, Jimmy, what a sight,
Talking playoffs every night.
By Week Three he’s planning rings,
By Week Ten he’s blaming everything.
The refs, the weather, Mercury in retrograde—
Anything but how his team played!
Bridge
He cried when they lost, he swore he was done,
Said, “I’m never watching!” and lasted one month.
Then draft day came and Jimmy declared,
“We got our guy!” like he personally scouted him there.
Final Chorus
Oh Jimmy, Jimmy, never change,
Your football logic is truly strange.
You could watch a hundred heartbreaks and still withstand,
Because nobody quits like a Cowboys fan!
Outro
So raise a cold one for Jimmy tonight,
A man whose hope burns impossibly bright.
And if you listen closely, you’ll hear his battle cry:
“THIS IS OUR YEAR!”
…for the 27th year in a row.