The Armor

I built my life with armor,

With plans and roads to pave,

Always looking ten years forward,

Never stopping long enough to stay.

You kept saying you were drowning,

I kept hearing “we’ll be fine,”

I thought I was protecting tomorrow,

While you were trying to survive tonight.

And somewhere between your silence,

And all the things I couldn’t see,

You were asking for a partner,

While I was guarding pieces of me.

Now there’s a pit inside my throat,

And your side of the bed is cold,

And I finally found the words

When the story was already told.

You gave me things my father couldn’t,

You made me feel safe in my skin,

And I finally showed the heart beneath,

Before I put the armor on again.

I don’t know if we’re broken,

Or if we just got lost in the fear,

But it’s not every day you find somebody

Who makes the whole world disappear.

You thought I’d need a mansion,

A diamond bigger than the sky,

But I would’ve traded all the pictures

For one more honest night.

I never knew how heavy

The weight upon your shoulders grew,

You weren’t asking me to fix it,

You were asking me to stand with you.

And maybe you felt abandoned,

And maybe I feel it too,

Because you decided we might not make it,

Before I knew what you were going through.

Now there’s a pit inside my throat,

And your side of the bed is cold,

And I finally found the words

When the story was already told.

You gave me things my father couldn’t,

You made me feel safe in my skin,

And I finally showed the heart beneath,

Before I put the armor on again.

I don’t know if we’re broken,

Or if we just got lost in the fear,

But it’s not every day you find somebody

Who makes the whole world disappear.

Maybe love isn’t the question,

Maybe it never was,

Maybe we were two scared people

Trying to carry too much.

You couldn’t breathe,

I couldn’t see,

We were standing on the same side

Fighting different enemies.

And if there’s still a road between us,

I don’t need all the answers now,

I just need you to know

I finally understand somehow.

There’s still a pit inside my throat,

But the truth is finally here,

I love the man who held me steady,

When the world got loud with fear.

And if this is the ending,

I’ll carry what you gave to me,

But if there’s still a future waiting,

I hope we learn what it means to be a team.

Before the houses,

Before the rings,

Before the dreams we couldn’t name,

I just want you to know

You were never the thing

I was willing to lose.

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